1. |
Create Create Create
02:19
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if it's gonna sound bad
it at least has to be interesting
if it's gonna sound bad
it's gotta be interesting
that's what they might say!
but they only want the pretty refined version of what you make
they'd rather it be fake
cuz art's not about yourself, it's about a fanbase
they only want the art if it's pretty, clean, and perfect
they don't care what it means or if it was worth it
waste might be the way that they survive
but isolation is the place where self destruction thrives
and try as you might
the ideas could be great but it's fucked if it don't sound right
passion's out of sight
but talent's what gets you into the limelight
you don't mean shit to them, you're a voice on a speaker
and it better be clear or their interest grows weaker
you better be audible and have a nice synth
or you might as well be throwing .wavs in the abyss
create create create
but you have to meet the standards we always seem to make
consume consume consume
first hired, last fired, the crosshairs are on you
create create create
but you have to meet the standards we always seem to make
consume consume consume
first hired, last fired, the crosshairs are on you
if it's gonna sound bad
it at least has to be interesting
if it's gonna sound bad
it's gotta be interesting
i was born with a microphone soldered to my teeth
they wanted me to speak before i could even breathe
"speech impediment, my ass!" they said
then told me to get cracking cuz i'd soon be dead
and you've gotta find success to mean shit
you can't enjoy something, you gotta do the whole bit
promote this, network that, talk to them, dot your ts, and cross your eyes
parasocial parasite paralyzed paradise
you will die before you get old, my son
so you better do something of worth before you're done
and if you can't, well that's too bad, you'll never mean a thing
now dance for us you fucking idiot, write a song to sing
40Hz overdose, making sure you steer the boat
waveforms make you comatose, so join us in our toast
to the music that sounds like shit in the end
mixed on laptop speakers, but we can play pretend
create create create
but you have to meet the standards we always seem to make
consume consume consume
first hired, last fired, the crosshairs are on you
create create create
but you have to meet the standards we always seem to make
consume consume consume
first hired, last fired, the crosshairs are on you
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2. |
Injured Wrist
02:24
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some poetic way to sort my thoughts
not like i'm not, it's not a lot
you seek what's sought and get what's gotten
gone, forgotten, lost, and rotten
some special lie that we all bought into
we've been thru the caustic sinews, and then you
picked a different option from the menu i lent you
those messages i sent you end you or continue
hate to drag you into this
but life can't lend me any bliss
and things may always seem remiss
but i'll lend you my injured wrist
wounds start healing once they're kissed
certainly i won't be missed
it might make somebody pissed
when i lend you my injured wrist
hate to drag you into this
but life can't lend me any bliss
and things may always seem remiss
but i'll lend you my injured wrist
wounds start healing once they're kissed
certainly i won't be missed
it might make somebody pissed
when i lend you my injured wrist
mere days in these matters turn spousal
putrid sex object, go fuck a cow skull
deep throat the tongue, splay the gore across your asshole
mere minutes missing the trash-full agoraphobic castle
things change so blindingly quick that they stay the same
say my name six more times then you'll stay sane
then on the seventh line write same name
it stays lame, the exact way that my brain's trained
stay up in your lane and i'll stay in mine
by the eighth line, i've said what i've needed for the ninth time
and if you multiply my self by myself i don't seem mine
but you've seen worse cases, i'm just the latest in a long line of hatred
and i flourish when i'm hated, so please god abuse me so my conscience feels sated
i can only operate when shit is tough and the state of the world's not enough
calling bluffs and letting my chain rust and break at the slightest tug
and so what? if i'm so fucking loved, where's the love? it's a bust
fueled by lust and gushing and thrusting and blood
so please god abuse me the so i can give up
please god be abusive so i can erupt
please treat me terribly, that's how i need love
your love is my blood
so tear me open and make me feel loved
so tear me open and make me feel loved
so tear me open
hate to drag you into this
but life can't lend me any bliss
and things may always seem remiss
but i'll lend you my injured wrist
wounds start healing once they're kissed
certainly i won't be missed
it might make somebody pissed
when i lend you my injured wrist
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3. |
Jezebel
02:42
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good fucking lord
i'll show you right to the door
i'll shove you right thru the floor
no such pain as before
you play that game with me again
that's just not how friends treat friends
just means to your ends
must be nice to begin
descend descend descend descend, stop
that's enough to make my ears pop
sometimes life feels like Petscop
headshot, 1:1 crop
smudge, burn, gaussian blur
i mean if you're really sure
i forgot who you were
for a second there, camouflaged lure
something doesn't feel right about
letting it get this bad again
there will always be some doubt
about our motives, make that a trend
lend me your ear long enough and i'll tell you the story
about how it gets so rough that you think
fiction begets glory
jezebel, i feel like hell it's
hard to tell what you were thinking
if this was intentional or
if your boat's as quickly sinking
drink myself to death before i
let you have this victory
footsteps follow fear like scent trails, entrails
line the walls, history
there's no such thing as a smooth dismount around here
the crowd's fear resolves itself to a resigned cheer
a clear message that we've lost hope, or maybe no
something feels wrong about it, something we lost long ago
it's hard to know, it's harder to remember, even still to comprehend
we all know the ways you've sinned
but we won't say a fucking thing until it's beneficial to sacrifice
but as it steepens, make sure you sleep with two open eyes
yeah, that sounds right
out here fighting the good fight
if you cried today make sure to say so
the brain's a chip and the heart's the queso
okay so which one of you is up next
speak up i won't guess
i'll pick at random til somebody dies
it's about results, not truth and lies
live to fight another day, give your heart away
the aches and pains are nothing in the latterdays
the saints ascended quietly and paved the way
with good intentions and a failure
to communicate, differentiate between ails and cures
something doesn't feel right about
letting it get this bad again
there will always be some doubt
about our motives, make that a trend
lend me your ear long enough and i'll tell you the story
about how it gets so rough that you think
fiction begets glory
jezebel, i feel like hell it's
hard to tell what you were thinking
if this was intentional or
if your boat's as quickly sinking
drink myself to death before i
let you have this victory
footsteps follow fear like scent trails, entrails
line the walls, history
something doesn't feel right about
letting it get this bad again
there will always be some doubt
about our motives, make that a trend
lend me your ear long enough and i'll tell you the story
about how it gets so rough that you think
fiction begets glory
jezebel, i feel like hell it's
hard to tell what you were thinking
if this was intentional or
if your boat's as quickly sinking
drink myself to death before i
let you have this victory
footsteps follow fear like scent trails, entrails
line the walls, history
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4. |
Bled To Death
02:41
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i'm god
no one can tell me i'm wrong
twenty one years and i'm still goin strong
and no one can keep me from singin my song
validation
getting heart reacts from all across every nation
art is 90% masturbation
and i am my own creation
live my life too fast but i won't slow down yet
i promise not to fuck my liver or go into profound debt
won't be fed or watered like a house pet, a sound bet
around set [alarms] for the morning i might be found dead
i'll blow open your whole trapeze and clown act
will fight fucks to my last breath, don't doubt that, i vow that
i just haven't found a place i can set my crown at
and haven't found a place that i can just lay down at
i bled to death last night
but god i feel alright
i know that times are tight
but if you could just spare a pint?
i bled to death last night
but god i feel alright
i know that times are tight
but if you could just spare a
i don't want to sound conceited but i have to be to live
if my doppelganger gets defeated i'm not going with
i don't even know where the original is now
i don't fully remember it, this proves a simulacrum somehow
i don't fully understand the meaning of that word
give a fuck if corrected, if you're so fucking sure
get the motherfuck off your ass and help me
i've lost a lot of blood the walls look like they're melting
i'm cocky to a fault, demanding, maybe needy
bitchy, bossy, narcissistic, self-obsessive, greedy
but those are all words used to describe me
when i need the help the doctors won't prescribe me
so ex-fucking-scuse me princess if i ask a lot
my body's fucking failing me, slowly my brain starts to rot
i guess it's a lot to motherfucking ask y'all
to fetch me a bandaid while i'm bleeding out on the asphalt
i bled to death last night
but god i feel alright
i know that times are tight
but if you could just spare a pint?
i bled to death last night
but god i feel alright
i know that times are tight
but if you could just spare a pint?
i bled to death last night
but god i feel alright
i know that times are tight
but if you could just spare a pint?
i bled to death last night
but god i feel alright
i know that times are tight
but if you could just spare a pint?
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5. |
Children's Music
01:29
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hey kids! gather around
i'm gonna sing you all a song
are you ready?
you all make me feel like a fucking child
you all make me feel like a fucking child
you all make me feel like a fucking child
you all make me feel like a fucking child
how much trauma do i have to endure before i loop back around and feel my own age?
i'm supposed to be young and fun in my 20s but i'm blinded out of youth by a white hot rage
i feel like i've lived twice or three times longer than i actually have
but you always imply that i'm just a baby i have a whole life ahead of me it makes me so mad
fuck you i'm alive
fuck you i'm alive
i'm so dead inside
i'm not a fucking child
20 motherfucking years
i feel like death might be near
i can see so crystal clear
i'm not a fucking child
fuck you i'm alive
fuck you i'm alive
i'm so dead inside
i'm not a fucking child
20 motherfucking years
i can see so crystal clear
i feel like death might be near
i'm not a fucking
you all make me feel like a fucking child
you all make me feel like a fucking child
you all make me feel like a fucking child
you all make me feel like a fucking
i hate this shit, i'm sick of it, like any of you aged right
i don't need your condescending while i'm fighting my fight
i hate this shit, i'm sick of it, like any of you aged right
don't need your condescending while i'm fighting my fight
maybe 10 years from now i'll concede i'm young and don't know shit
but i live in the moment, the only way i handle it
knowing smiles and dismissal of my problems always bothered me
i don't trust adults so if you're feeling fatherly
leave me alone unless your guidance actually guides me
as if you know the struggles that i've always kept inside me
i've got guilt and pain that constantly rides me
"but sweetie, you're so young! you're a baby!" fucking bite me
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6. |
Livin' The Dream...
02:18
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stopping is out of the question
getting the fucking message
i'm ruining my body
the question's how do i stop it
i don't wanna be doing this, it must hurt to watch me
spiral out of control in the hot seat
i need the caffeine and nicotine to keep my blood pumping
i still feel like i'm missing something
this isn't up to me
it's the will of the world, you see
if i die, please don't mourn
i was destined to do this when i was born
somebody help me, please god do something
it's so much easier to say that i feel nothing
but really i'm full of constant vivid emotion
it's fucking torture, my life is atrocious
i'm never honest when i say i got this
i'm fucking hopeless, i didn't want this
but i can only talk about it in my art
and i hope no one asks how i'm doing these days cuz i don't know where to start
something is coming
couldn't tell you what but it's something unwanted
i hope it isn't love cuz i can't do that again
til i'm like 47
and the doctors told me when i was 14
i'd be a lucky motherfucker to make it to 33
so excuse me if i sound a bit dramatic
when turning 21 sends me into a panic
despite twice i've tried, i don't want to die
but the monster and the cigarettes are slow suicide
and i can feel my heart freaking the fuck out in there
screaming at me like i'm not aware
feel my brain cells melt away
i push help back for another day
and if the blood pressure don't kill me first
it'll be the depression, anxiety, adhd, dysphoria, psychosis, seeing living shadows, hearing voices, or something even worse
somebody help me, please god do something
it's so much easier to say that i feel nothing
but really i'm full of constant vivid emotion
it's fucking torture, life is atrocious
it's never honest when i say i got this
i'm fucking hopeless, i didn't want this
but i can only talk about it in my art
and i hope no one asks me how i'm doing these days cuz i don't know where to start
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7. |
||||
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gotta go to work to get the money to get the gas to be able to afford to
go to work to be able to afford to
go to work to be able to afford to
go to work to be able to afford to
go to work to be able to
nothing can be said for the piles of the dead
no one's taking credit for the walls stained red
unapologetic, stick to reddit for your cred
stay the fuck up out the bread if you wanna keep your head
names and addresses are depressing, they don't change
those fuckers are still breathing and not bleeding, insane
no one has the guts to do something for once
killers counting millions while Rogan smokin blunts
out there counting stacks licking sweat up off our backs
no one is reacting, no attacks, that's wack
i would like to live to see Jeff Bezos get the shiv
Musk can go with Kochs eat shit
more like Steven Coward, Prager can get choked
more deaths by the hour, our planet is a joke
sea levels are rising and there's children fucking dying
good lord we live in a fascist dystopia
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8. |
Disgusting
01:03
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this is not a promise it's a threat
i swear fucking to god i'd be better off dead
i might be great in hindsight but overlooked and forgotten about early like better off ted
i might marry a piece of shit like portia de rossi
and dare a motherfucker step correct or get off me
sorry you lost me, what the fuck were you saying?
make it worth my time or worth your life, i'm not fucking playing
bitch i can't hear shit but sirens and sines
clear as mud on the tinnitus grind
shit is tentatively mine, shit ain't prison so it's fine
i got prisms on the mind, light refraction so inclined
i'm secure like the bag and shaped like one too
but the bitches love the belly or so they tell me, so true
so if you want a piece go ahead be my guest
never tire, no rest, i'm not sleep deprived i'm blessed
do not fuck with me, my parents never loved me or something
it's been a hot second since i didn't feel disgusting
or useless or worthless or any of that good shit
dear lord oh my fucking goodness
do not fuck with me, parents never loved me or something
it's been a hot second since i didn't feel disgusting
or useless or worthless or any of that good shit
dear oh lord oh my fucking goodness
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9. |
Number-go-upism
02:25
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tomorrow is a new day in the empire of gold
life's an elevator pitch and I'm already sold
there's a hundred stories you will never be told
our lungs are ankle monitors, the air exists to scold
it's getting old, rotting brains fall out like teeth that the fluoride missed
I wish chemtrails were real so the sky had reason to exist
what's allowed in heaven is written on your wrist
the earth gave birth to mouths that needed to be kissed
I'll give you this: politics is one scary game of hoop and stick
it makes me sick to think that there are troops in showers lacking dick
the femboy runs the twitter, the daddy dom controls the puppet show
the twinks are fucking cowards, the bears have motives that're hard to know
fucking blows, the revolution ain't coordinated
can't be televised, cuz it's on TikTok, tweet the mission statement
Black Mirror got it wrong, we sing the song: "technology
has set me free and I can't see a world without streaming TV"
phone good, actually
I feel fucking psychotic
watch the number go up and up
human touch is rare, exotic
I'm inside my mind too much
same with every other fag
we can't keep fucking on the internet
we need to raise our flag
phone good, actually
I feel fucking psychotic
watch the number go up and up
human touch is rare, exotic
I'm inside my mind too much
same with every other fag
we can't keep fucking on the internet
we need to raise our flag
back to back ads Google Home Assistant picked for me
they seem to think that I'm the kind of person that was listening
siblings from the womb of facebook.com
not moms, just life long care reacts and pipe bombs
the printer taught me psalms in morse code and the phones are dead
the MLMs are doing CBT, or that's what Claire said
awareness and being mindful likely are a fool's game
I'm without comprehension, wait for that to take the blame
the cranium inflamed, appendicitis might've gotten lame
ride from dawn to dawn, the dusk is optional, it's all the same
I'm the twilight princess, the media consumed me
my eyes fell out my head and that shit was fucking groovy
I might've had a statement I intended to get across
if my brain is smoothing out with time, the information's lost
if I had a nickel for every time that I forgot
I could install the chip in my brain before it rots
phone good, actually
I feel fucking psychotic
watch the number go up and up
human touch is rare, exotic
I'm inside my mind too much
same with every other fag
we can't keep fucking on the internet
we need to raise our flag
phone good, actually
I feel fucking psychotic
watch the number go up and up
human touch is rare, exotic
I'm inside my mind too much
same with every other fag
we can't keep fucking on the internet
we need to raise our flag
phone good, actually
I feel fucking psychotic
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10. |
Test Run Failed
02:24
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every time you speak to me i stop myself from blowing up
it seems like no matter what i do it's simply not enough
more than just my father you were my best friend at some point
it seems like i should give up cuz i'll always disappoint
test run failed so you said fuck it
won't you ever look at me again?
test run failed so you said fuck it
won't you ever look at me again?
i think i was worthy of love
at some point but that was then
being your daughter was inexcusable
i know that now but i can't change my skin
i can't kill myself now because i wouldn't know how
but when i was about to you sat that one out
you didn't know it happened because you couldn't see me
how dare i live my truth? what the fuck was i thinking?
but it's alright, these are good terms i guess
i always thought so highly of you but i'll put that to rest
you were by my side until i crossed some line
never thought transition could cause this divide
thoughts pouring into my head don't stop
how am i supposed to get my point across?
i guess i should count this as a loss
underlying reasons we fight get tossed
i was mom's revenge for how she was as a kid
but i'm not your child anymore you ran and hid
behind her again so nobody wins
i kept my sanity at the cost of kin
test run failed so you said fuck it
won't you ever look at me again?
test run failed so you said fuck it
won't you ever look at me again?
i think i was worthy of love
at some point but that was then
being your daughter was inexcusable
i know that now but i can't change my skin
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11. |
Balancing Act
02:33
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dreams make you lose sleep, so keep your mind free
stay awake as long as possible, it keeps shit lively
this life shit's a signed lease, don't get comfy
this reminds me of something, dunno what but it's lovely
don't mind keeping tabs on the last laugh had
all too happy to know what makes who glad
what makes you sad? that could become relevant
awww that's too bad, another out of court settlement
slanted forward dead
broken bones like lead
weighing down the head
show your face instead
meaningless as in
matters of opinion
no more hands to lend
didn't think you would use them
i'm clean out these days
i can't count the ways
my endless supply
of patience runs dry
thought i could put up with some shit before
but as it turns out i'm about to shut the door
i don't have the time to keep up with your problems
i've got my own shit to solve, not your wants and whims
i'm not your fucking plaything anymore
i'm not yours
i'm not anybody's i'm completely sure
no rewards
you're such a fucking chore
you're such a fucking chore
you're such a fucking chore
you're such a fucking chore
feels like a motherfucking balancing act
out here sometimes
this shit don't feel okay
i know exactly how you'd react
drought's near, no wine
nothing left to say
the important thing about this analogy
is you can get off the beam and walk away
if your body's in agony don't stand,
just molotov the gym and find peace another day
feels like a motherfucking balancing act
out here sometimes
this shit don't feel okay
i know exactly how you'd react
drought's near, no wine
nothing left to say
the important thing about this analogy
is you can get off the beam and walk away
if your body's in agony don't stand,
just molotov the gym and find peace another day
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12. |
Avert Your Eyes
05:17
|
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we avoid the task at hand not much left to talk about
employed your master plan, must be grand, here we stand left with lots to doubt
and still you've locked me out, but what's 8 years to the devout?
wow, great fear comes with great reactions, ask what happened, could be start of lasting routes
teapot short and stout, you've got a great handle on the hot air you spout, missy
need not worry for the future, you sure talk a lot for someone so dismissing
but what do you wanna discuss? some disgust about us, of course not, more history
we can wait forever for the lever to get pulled and the trapdoor to free us, shut the fuck up and kiss me
what's a first move to a serial adulterer? or a curse to an occultist? her eyes aren't focused, blurred
but you can lay your eyes on mine and be fine sine waves coalesce on the scene of the murder
you hate it as much as yours, assaults plural but still pure, and i've got your fears cured
a ritual fervor ensured, lust for habitual sutures
i guess i got a long way to go to prove myself to you
it's yes, it's not so wrong, saying no delays the clear truth
i'm not so taboo, i think we could turn three into two
i'm just some fool who thinks she might be in love with you
i guess i got a long way to go to prove myself to you
it's yes, it's not so wrong, saying no delays the clear truth
i'm not so taboo, i think we could turn three into two
i'm just some fool who thinks she might be in love with you
neck broken i bet, head on crooked, unspoken, unsaid
i'm dead, i was before i bled, messages forever sat unread
sorrow fills the air, tomorrow kills awareness of your actions
packed in to the brim, borrowed, filled, and careless factions
listen in for where i committed my last infraction
inflection marks the truth, what that means to you is immaterial
here we go again, i'm finding what i hear you stole
clearly cold, lifeless bleary soul, absentmindedly pouring cereal
mindlessly ain't the word, that's pyrite appearing gold, as it were
you recognize your actions on some level, pot screaming kettle, my head's all sad and churned
if it had occurred to me i would've stopped something way worse, it seems
this hurts, it screams
i'm cursed, we gleam directly matching eyelines on the sky right as the skirt splits it seams
churches build on graveyards, worked and killed to stay hard, call me back when May starts
cuz i don't wanna hear your shit during April, that's the month where I break apart
after everything you'd think i'd be a bit more careful with who i see
but now i think it might be beneficial to let you move towards me
after everything you'd think i'd be a bit more careful with who i see
but now i think it might be beneficial to let you move towards me
i guess i got a long way to go to prove myself to you
it's yes, it's not so wrong, saying no delays the clear truth
i'm not so taboo, i think we could turn three into two
i'm just some fool who thinks she might be in love with you
i guess i got a long way to go to prove myself to you
it's yes, it's not so wrong, saying no delays the clear truth
i'm not so taboo, i think we could turn three into two
i'm just some fool who thinks she might be in love with you
i guess i got a long way to go to prove myself to you
it's yes, it's not so wrong, saying no delays the clear truth
i'm not so taboo, i think we could turn three into two
i'm just some fool who thinks she might be in love with you
i guess i got a long way to go to prove myself to you
it's yes, it's not so wrong, saying no delays the clear truth
i'm not so taboo, i think we could turn three into two
i'm just some fool who thinks she might be in love with you
|
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13. |
||||
|
she sips from the lip of her cup
and i am the wick that licks her up
i'm drunk from the fuel inside her head
as it spills from her lips and soaks the bed
like kerosene
she peels back the sheets and coats my spine
she strips faster than turpentine
like kerosene
like kerosene
don't put me out
don't put me out
don't put me out
don't put me out
don't put me out
don't put me out
don't put me out
don't put me out
i play with the fire that incinerates
until her desire evaporates
like kerosene
like kerosene
like kerosene
|
||||
INVADER TRIN Fargo, North Dakota
THIS IS THE END FOR YOU
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